A classic quote: “Insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results.”
I’ve made it a goal to spend more time outside, off technology, in the open air just exploring my thoughts. We have a lovely forest preserve about 25 minutes away from our house, and that seemed like a great way to support that goal.
I have not been much of a hiker or park visitor. I’m not completely sure how they work. I know that there are trails… and you walk on them. That was about it. Fortunately, as a millennial, I always check for a website. All of the trails were on the website.
Great, I should be fine. How difficult can it be?
I got to the preserve and found a trail. I’m not sure that it was really the one that I wanted, but it was the first one I found so I went for it. I looked it up on the website and it was about the distance that I was looking for.
So far, so good.
It was a beautiful day out, and there was nature all around. It was lovely and the experience was going as well as could be expected. Even if it’s as small as going on a nature walk for the first time on my own… anything to get out of my comfort zone is a great practice.
I remembered on the trail map that there was a section where there was a small path off that went in a bit of a half circle and met up with the trail again at a spot farther up. Basically a straight way and a tiny bit more scenic way. Since I didn’t really know what I was doing I just kept walking.
Either way was a brand new experience for me.
Then I got to the turn. So, I turned. As I kept walking I came upon another turn, a turn that I was not expecting. I took a look at the map, wasn’t completely sure of my path, but just picked and kept going.
At this point I thought I was on the second portion of the trail which began after the big hump/detour. I thought that until I ended up back at a sign that I had already walked past that is.
Ok… that’s fine. At least I know where I am. I’ll just go back and try something different! I can figure this out.
Then I was at the sign again.
And again.
I told myself I would try one more time. Even though I had tried every path. But, quite honestly, I didn’t have any idea what I was going to try that was different. Then I got out my phone and the trail that my phone showed me looked quite different than the one that was on the website.
On this fourth try I walked past where I assumed that the trail ended. Lo and behold there was the rest of my trail just waiting for me to continue my adventure.
Walking in circles can be frustrating, especially when trying something new. It can also provide lessons and the experience necessary to learn, make better decisions, grow stronger effort, and get an understanding of what I’m doing.
This walk was a perfect example making up truth, “the trail couldn’t possibly be on the other side of that tree line.” Simply because the map looked one way or because I assumed it had to be a certain way.
How often do I limit myself purely based on what I perceive or tell myself in the moment? I was so close to turning around and just walking back. There I was on the verge of giving up when the only barrier ahead of me was my own doubt and unwillingness to see what was on the other side of the “wall”.
It’s ok to walk in circles, just be sure to knock some dents in it along the way to test it out and make it a little bigger as you go.
Don’t disturb the plants though - they are supposed to be there.
